Our Path to Belonging

“We are socialized to fix, instead of experience, our suffering of bittersweetness; Whereas the wholehearted embrace of “both and” creates a [sense of] belonging within ourselves.”

In his new book, Reunion: Leadership and the Longing to Belong, Jerry Colonna shares the story of an executive who asked him at an event: What happens when you no longer have a hero to look up to? The question surprised Jerry. Still, as an author, renowned coach, and the CEO and Co-founder of Reboot, he compassionately knelt down to ask: Who’s gone? Patrick, as he is described, shared that his mother passed away. She was his hero and he was lost without her guidance. Patrick’s story offered me an awakening gift—I finally understood why my grandfather’s loss continues to be so heartbreaking. 

Remembrance is the first step we take with Jerry in Reunion, which at its heart, is an invitation towards deeper connection to our ancestors, ourselves, and each other. Each reader's path unfolds uniquely—through recognition, reconnection, and reclaiming—bringing them to a sense of belonging within themselves. Then, to one of the book’s central questions: How does my sense of belonging influence the sense of belonging I create for others?  

“I think what is often missing is landing into our own experience; Using our own body, almost as a tuning fork, to tune into what the other person is feeling,” Jerry says. “When we do that, there's this wordless connection that feels both safe and nourishing because we can finally just be ourselves. That, to me, is the essence of belonging.” 

Our conversation is an exploration of Jerry’s own path to reunion, which takes him to Ireland to visit the grave of his father’s biological mother; To the shade of the cottonwood tree where the conversations he had with his father, 30 years after his passing, helped heal their relationship; And, to the “both and” realization he arrives at with his mother, who despite struggling with mental illness, unwaveringly saved $2 a week to buy his brother and him a camera for photography class. 

Jerry encapsulates his own reunion journey by sharing that—“When I reunite with who they were, I move one step closer to my own wholeness.”—and invites us to embark on our own. May his wisdom inspire and accompany you as you take your first step.

“It takes breaking open our hearts to see what is going on in the world. It takes being able to compassionately be with the suffering to identify: Where are we supposed to look? And where, more importantly, are we supposed to work to create the world that we want to see?” 

With love,
Jenna